Compassion

Compassion could be the most valuable gift you give to others, even though it doesn’t need to cost a penny.

Compassion is not simply feeling sorry for the circumstances of others from a distance but sharing in their suffering and taking action to alleviate it. While genuine compassion for our patients is always a priority, in the midst of the busyness of our days, it is easy to forget to show the same care for our colleagues.

How can we share in their suffering?

Be aware of their pain. If we have a heart to see grief, God will send hurting people into our lives. Watch for anger, frustration, and personal neglect as well as tears. Grief can come out at the most unexpected times and in many different ways.

Realize that the pain of the people around you matters to you. Whether at work, home, church, or in the community, we depend on each other and when one person is hurting, we all suffer.

Be willing to feel concern. It sounds simple, but our impulse is to protect ourselves from hurt, rather than wading into it to help someone else.

Take action to help relieve their grief. Listen when they are ready to talk. Cry with them. Tears are not weak. On the contrary, in grief, tears speak of strong love.

Ultimately, be patient. Grief doesn’t have a timeline.

For those who find themselves in a challenging environment where they are juggling increasing responsibilities and time pressures, how can they take active steps towards incorporating more compassion in their work?

Four steps to take:

Step 1: Noticing and giving attention to the suffering around you.

Step 2: Interpreting that suffering as in part relevant to you and something that you should care about.

Step 3: The third is the emotional part. It's feeling concern for the well-being of the person who is suffering, or what researchers call empathic concern.

Step 4: Taking some kind of action to address or alleviate the suffering.

So first, we can notice the suffering that's already in our work environment-not just suffering of patients, but also of colleagues. Then, we can feel more empathy and concern for each other, because we're all suffering from the lack of time and the erosion of meaning in the work. Once we do that, then we open the door for people to be creative about how they want to express compassion to their colleagues. Our research suggests that people will find lots of different ways of taking compassionate action. It can be just a few kind words or just patting somebody on the back or saying, “Hang in there. I see how hard you're working.” Even these small moves matter a great deal.